Bartimaeus to the Rescue
by WhySoComplex
Summary: Bartimaeus uses his wonderful brain to figure out a way for Nathaniel to survive the falling iron and glass. Nataniel gets to continue life and flirt with Kitty all he wants. And get annoyed by good old Bart. But living does have it's advantages. Warning: SPOILERS FOR THIRD BOOK and very witty and typical Bart. T for romance, mild language, and Bart's suggestive comments.
1. Chapter 1

**SPOILER ALERT for book three! DO NOT READ!**

**Hey I'm WhySoComplex! I really didn't like the last book of the Bartimaeus Trilogy. Well, I did, but I didn't like the ending. 'Cus Nathaniel died. So I wrote this because many of the stories with Nathaniel and Kitty are sad and do not capture the humor in the books. In some of them Bartimaeus is out of character! So I'm like, you know, if you want something done, you gotta do it yourself. Well, enjoy! **

**IMPORTANT NOTE: ****This story starts right before Nathaniel and Bartimaeus are about to kill Nouda.**

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**_Bartimaeus_**

_Bartimaeus… _The thought was very faint.

_ Yes?_

_ You've been a good servant…_

What do you _say_ to something like this? I mean, with death bearing down and a 5,000 year career of incomparable accomplishment about to hit the fan? The appropriate response, frankly, is some sort of a rude gesture, followed up by the loudest of raspberries, but again I was stymied- being in his body made the logistics too cumbersome to bother with.(1)So, wearily, wishing we had some kind of maudlin sound track, I played along. _Well, um, you've been just dandy too._

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(1)Well, try giving yourself a rude gesture. It just doesn't work, does it?

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_ I didn't say you were perfect… _

_ What?_

_ Far from it. Let's face it, you've generally managed to cock things up._

_ WHAT? _The bloody cheek! Insults, at a time like this! With death bearing down, etc. I ask you. I rolled up my metaphorical sleeves. _Well, since we're doing some straight talking, let me tell you buddy—_

_ Which is why I'm dismissing you right now. _

_ Eh? _But I hadn't misheard. I knew I hadn't. I could read his mind.

_Don't take it the wrong way… _His thought was fragmented, fleeting, but his mouth was already murmuring the spell. _It's just that… we've got to break the Staff at the right moment here. You're holding it in check. But I can't rely on you for something as important as this. You're bound to mess up somehow. Best thing is… best thing is to dismiss you. That'll trigger the Staff automatically. Then I KNOW it'll be done properly. _

_Nathaniel—_

_Say hello to Kitty for me._

Then Nouda was upon us. Mouths opened, tentacles slashed down. Nathaniel finished the dismissal. I felt the tug to leave to the Other Place.

I fought the tug.

All of us essence beings know that it is impossible to resist the tug. But I had had practice. (2) I fought the tug and got one of my extremely special brilliant ideas. With all my remaining strength, I tossed the staff at Nouda and leaped a powerful and extraordinary leap backwards. Old Natty really owed me big time now.

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(2) With my only other time trying back in the good days with Ptolemy. Long story. Remind me to tell you sometime.

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I couldn't resist the tug anymore. I left. The Staff broke.

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**Let me know how it was! I know how hard it can be to review when you are lazy(3) but please take the time to do so. Please? I'll post another chapter soon. This one was short, but… oh well. The others will be longer.**

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**(3)I know from experience. Wow now I'm using footnotes too. Good ol' Bart.**

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**Have a nice day!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Ok, here goes Chapter 2! Enjoy!**

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_**Nathaniel**_

Nathaniel suddenly flew backwards, no longer holding the staff. While he was in mid air the staff exploded, sending Nathaniel hurtling violently backwards. He landed on the ground hard on his back, sending shock waves and pain through his entire body. He wanted desperately to close his eyes and sleep, but then he saw literally tons of broken glass fly towards him. He closed his eyes and put his hands over his head. The glass landed on top of him and he felt the cold sharpness of them bite into his already damaged skin. He felt some pieces land on his side, which hurt like hell. He wanted to scream but he was too tired to open his mouth.

He opened his eyes, seeing that there was glass everywhere. In that moment he realized three things: 1) He couldn't see as well and his vision was blurry because he didn't have Bartimaeus's sight, 2) Speaking of Bartimaeus, Nathaniel couldn't hear his annoying voice in his head, 3) Nouda was nowhere to be seen, which mean they had succeeded. Kitty would be—

Wait! Kitty! Where was she? He looked around furiously. Suddenly he spotted a dark figure moving through the dust and debris. It was coughing. Nathaniel struggled to get up. He coughed as well. It didn't seem to hear. Maybe he was a ghost after all. He finally succeeded in getting up and he stumbled towards it.

The dark figure fell to its knees. "So much for your promises," She (it was definitely a she) said. Nathaniel hoped he wasn't in hell with this being a nasty old trick from the devil. He stumbled towards the figure.

"I keep my promises. Well, at least I kept this one," Nathaniel said, his vocal cords aching.

The figure turned around. Nathaniel stumbled back. It was the devil. He gasped. The figure stood up.

"Hey, I'm not _that _ugly!" Kitty said, then stepped forward and threw her arms around him. He sighed in relief. She was covered in dirt, her once black hair gray. Her face was covered in lines and her eyes were bagged and teary. Her clothes were in rags and she had several blisters. It was no wonder he had mistaken her for the devil. He put his arms around her. Then fainted.

_**Kitty**_

Kitty watched as Nathaniel fell, almost being brought down with him. He was also covered in dirt, and he had glass that sparkled on his skin like frost. His side was covered in blood and tiny specks of glass.

"Nath- John!" She said in worry, kneeling beside him. She noticed that there were tired magicians all around her. She glared at them.

"Well, what are you going to do, just stand there?" Kitty asked, disgusted. "Go get Mr. Mandrake a doctor!" The magicians hurried to do her bidding. Kitty looked at Nathaniel.

"Just make it through," She said, wiping her tears away and hugging him.

_**Nathaniel**_

Nathaniel was having a wonderful time. Away from all the magicians, Nathaniel didn't have to worry about politics or government duties. He was happy now, in a small car with Kitty, driving who knows where. They were talking, sharing stories, laughing.

"Hey Kitty?" Nathaniel asked after a round of hysterical laughter which should have seriously disrupted his driving.

"Hmm?"

"Have you ever thought of getting married?" Nathaniel asked, a bit nervous.

Laughter exploded from the back seat. Nathaniel almost crashed the car into a truck. They both turned around, which is seriously unadvisable while driving. There was an Egyptian boy in the back seat, cracking up.

"'Have you ever thought of getting married' HAHAHA! Nathaniel, you are hilarious! Never thought that would come out of your mouth to anyone but Farrar!" Bartimaeus said, making Nathaniel blush.

"How the hell did you get there Bartimaeus? Kitty, did you summon him?" Nathaniel asked. Kitty shook her head.

"I am invincible!" Bartimaeus said, jumping out the window.

Nathaniel crashed the car into a lamppost.

_**Kitty**_

Kitty sat in a chair, next to Nathaniel, who was asleep. He had two cracked ribs and an injured shoulder. He had broken glass all over him thanks to the building until the doctors removed it all. His skin was damaged and would heal, they said. He had been asleep for three days straight, lying in the hospital. Kitty had been next to him as much as she could, despite the doctor's suggestion.

Nathaniel opened his eyes wide. Kitty smiled and held his hand. They looked at each other for a long time. Then Nathaniel spoke.

"I just had the weirdest dream ever," he said.

"What was it about?" Kitty asked, raising her eyebrow.

"Driving a car to who knows where and lampposts," Nathaniel said, then fell asleep. Kitty grinned, then pushed Nathaniel aside and laid down next to him. She fell asleep soon after.

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**If you're wondering where Bartimaeus went, just wait till the next chapter. Or the one after that. He will be back. The part with Nathaniel in the car was a dream, BTW. Ok, so review and tell me how it was! **

**Have a nice day!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Uhh….Hey guys I'm back!**

**Bartimaeus: It's about time.**

**Uhh yeah sorry for the wait but the next chapter is here!**

**Random gruff guy: Great job, kid.**

**Enjoy!**

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_**Nathaniel**_

Nathaniel awoke to see Kitty sitting next to him in a chair, reading a book. He coughed and she looked at him. She smiled.

"How are you doing?" She asked him.

When he spoke his voice came out raspy. "I'm fine, just a little bit sore. How long has it been since I blew up?" He asked.

"Not that long," She answered. "Your magician _friends_ tried to kick me out, but I reminded them that it was me who saved their sorry asses." She grinned. So did Nathaniel. He could defiantly imagine her saying something like that.

"How are you doing?" Nathaniel asked her. He noticed that her physical appearance had improved overall. Her warts were less visible and the bags under her eyes had gotten much smaller. Her face had fewer lines than the last time he saw her. She must have gotten some rest, he thought.

"Better than ever," She said, grinning. "Some magicians are actually afraid of me now. Next thing you know they'll be like djinnis for me."

The door opened and in came someone that neither Nathaniel nor Kitty wanted or expected to see. It was like having your wife come into your house while you're kissing your girlfriend. (A/N: Not that I know from experience!) It was Farrar. An awkward silence overtook the room as Farrar and Kitty glared at each other with a mutual dislike and disgust. Farrar was the first to look away. She looked at Nathaniel and spoke.

"Ms. Jones, could you please leave the room?" She asked. She said it like one would issue an order. "I need to speak to Mr. Mandrake in private."

Before Kitty could respond with a rude word, Nathaniel spoke.

"Ms. Jones will hear anything she wants to hear, Farrar." Nathaniel said. Kitty smirked at Farrar and resisted the urge to stick her tongue out. Farrar was fuming. Nathaniel swore he could see smoke coming off her head. Farrar bottled up her anger and responded.

"Very well," She said. "In three days there will be a meeting in the Houses of Parliament in which a new Prime Minister will be chosen. You are among the candidates. There will be some commoner candidates as well." Farrar said the word commoner the way Bartimaeus would say 'Nathaniel's underwear'. "I assume you will attend?" She asked. Nathaniel's mind raced. PRIME MINISTER! If he became Prime Minister, he would hold such power! He would be treated with much respect. If he was told this a few months ago he would not have hesitated.

But now it was different. Now he cared about things other than power and rank. Things like Kitty. He wasn't sure he wanted to be a magician anymore. For the first time he was considering leaving the government and quitting his job. He tried to lock eyes with Kitty but she wouldn't look at him.

Farrar looked at Nathaniel expectantly, confused at why he hadn't responded yet. She knew his chances of being Prime Minister were high, and when he became Prime Minister, she would get in a relationship with him, which would allow her to climb ranks faster. She had it all planned out. So why wasn't he answering? Did it have something to do with the commoner, Kitty?

Kitty spoke out unexpectedly. "How many other magicians will be running for prime minister? Will commoners be voting?" She asked venomously. Farrar was taken aback. She looked at Nathaniel. He nodded.

"You heard her. Answer the questions. I'm curious." He said. Farrar grinded her teeth. Her patience was running thin.

"Fine. Sholto Pinn will be running, along with two commoners." Farrar said. Nathaniel vaguely remembered Pinn as the man with a overly attached servent named Simpkin. He noticed that Farrar sneered as she said the word commoner. "Commoners will have a third of the vote."

_**Kitty**_

When Kitty heard this, she was furious. _One third? The other two thirds would be magicians! _There was no way a commoner candidate would be chosen as Prime Minister. Maybe other positions, but definitely not Prime Minister. There was only one way this government wouldn't end up the same as the last. And that was if Nathaniel became Prime Minister. She looked at him. He looked back. He spoke to Farrar without looking away from Kitty.

"Farrar, could you please leave the room so Ms. Jones and I can talk in private?" Nathaniel asked politely. Farrar sighed and left.

"You need to run for Prime Minister," Kitty said. Nathaniel nodded.

"I understand. It's the only way," Nathaniel said, sighing. "Farrar!" He called. Farrar entered the room. "Tell the council that I will attend and run for Prime Minister." Farrar tried to contain her excitement. Her plan was going as she expected! She was glad that that brat Kitty wasn't able to keep John from becoming Prime Minister. She was giddy with almost childish excitement.

"Very well," Farrar said seriously. "I will inform them. Make sure you have your speech ready. I'll see you at the election." And then she left.

Neither Nathaniel nor Kitty noticed how exited Farrar really was.

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**I'm planning on bringing Bartimaeus back next chapter, but no promises. I do promise that he'll be back though. Please take a minute or two to review, and please let me know whether my characters are out of character. I'm sorry about taking too long to update, and it was the reviews that kept this story going. I read every single one of the reviews that you guys post, just to let you know. Thanks!**

**Have a nice day!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys‼ Sorry for taking so long, I had a lot happening in my life. But now I'm back! I want to give a shout out to my faithful reviewers M4dG4rl, who isn't all that mad ;) , Kanna Owlflight, who's reviews have helped convince me to write more, MaiWishes, my faithful first reviewer EVER, caro, guest, bcgraham13, who agreed with me on the ending of the third book :) , Gaia Calensul, who gave me an adorable Kitty face :D , TheDragooner, who flatters me with his praise :) , and finally, last but not least, marty! Thank you all! **

**Also I must recommend listening to the song "I Need Your Love" by Ellie Goulding while reading. It's great background music! Listen to it!**

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**Chapter 4**

**_Nathaniel_**

Nathaniel was allowed out of the hospital later that day. He leaned on Kitty as he walked out of the Hospital. London was still in ruins, but it was being repaired. He and Kitty paused after they came out, looking at what was left of London after the battle with Nouda and the other demons. Everywhere there were workers and magicians with djinni repairing the wreckage as best as they could. It was noon and hot, and Nathaniel could see the sweat glistening off the faces of magicians and commoners alike. Nathaniel shook his thoughts aside as his driver, a middle aged man, approached.

"Sir," the driver addressed him. "Would you like a wheelchair?"

Nathaniel did, but he saw some commoners look in his direction. He couldn't afford to look weak in their eyes. Not if he wanted to be Prime Minister. He looked at Kitty and spoke t the driver. "No, I can manage."

As the driver drove them towards Nathaniel new temporary home (his old one had been destroyed) Nathaniel looked out the window at the ruins. It struck him as odd as how the commoners were working together with the magicians with no problems. It was surprising. There may be hope for a new Britain after all, He mused.

They arrived at his home, a large manor beside a pond. Weeks before he would have been trilled to have such a large piece of property all to himself. Now he just thought it was a bit too large… and it seemed cruel to have such a large home when he had seen so many people forced to live on the streets. Nathaniel stepped out of the car, leaning on Kitty for support. He looked to the other side of the street, seeing people staring right back at him.

Some wore tattered clothes; others had faces covered in ash. Their eyes had fear and hate… for him. They knew who he was; John Mandrake, living in a mansion while '_mere commoners'_ lived on the streets in misery. Mandrake would take the title of Prime Minister from the hands of the commoner nominees who were actually trying to change something for the better.

John Mandrake would go into his home, not glancing once at the commoners.

But Nathaniel would not.

Because Nathaniel knew things other than power, rank, greed, and wealth. Things like a certain Kitty.

Nathaniel looked at Kitty. She looked right back. Something passed between them. Nathaniel, not Mandrake, stepped away from Kitty, ignoring the pain in his barely healed ribs and his shoulder. "How many rooms does this house have?" He asked his driver.

"Uh… 51 sir. Sir! You should not try to walk unassisted! You are handicapped!"

Nathaniel ignored him, looking straight at the people on the street. They looked back at him, scared for their lives. Nathaniel cleared his voice, and then spoke.

"Come! All are welcome in my home! You may take one room for you and your family! There are plenty to go around. Stay as long as you like!" Nathaniel said. The commoners looked at him in shock. They expected to be punished for one reason or another. Not to be offered living quarters!

But their shock was only brief. The grabbed the few things they had and ran into Nathaniel's manor. Nathaniel watched them go, grinning to himself. Welcome to the new age, he thought.

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It was the afternoon. Many people had moved temporarily to Nathaniel's mansion. All of the bedrooms were full, and more people were coming in by the hour. Some took the living room and basement and even the hallways. They didn't complain because they had all they wanted at the moment; food, beds, and a roof over their heads. They were together with their friends and family, and everyone, including Nathaniel and Kitty was sharing stories and joking at the table in the oversized dining room. It was warm and friendly and happy. All the things anyone wanted.

After dinner everyone began to disperse, going back to their living quarters and their beds or sleeping bags or couches. Nathaniel and Kitty returned to their room and bid farewell to Nathaniel's driver, Mark, who turned out to be an expert conversationalist. Nathaniel and Kitty stayed in the same room so one of the families could have a room. And besides, Nathaniel couldn't survive without Kitty's company.

Nathaniel considered summoning Bartimaeus, but then put it off. Partly because he was too tired to, partly because he thought Bartimaeus deserved a break, but mostly because he wanted some time alone with Kitty. It was a good thing Bartimaeus wasn't around right now, because if he saw what Nathaniel was thinking about right now, he would have exploded with laughter.

Nathaniel closed the door behind him. Kitty sat on the bed. She smiled at him warmly.

"That was great! The way you let them in to you house to stay, I mean. You just made a lot of people happy. Parents and kids alike," she said.

"Thanks," Nathaniel said. "We need to do things like this if we're going to change the government."

"There is hope yet," Kitty said. "Speaking of which, I want to go visit my parents tomorrow. Do you mind writing your speech on your own?" She asked. Nathaniel's heart fell. He had wanted to spend some time with her doing… well, whatever they did. But he knew he couldn't keep her from visiting her parents.

"No, of course I don't mind! I'll manage on my own, you go ahead," he said, smiling.

"Thanks, Nat!" Kitty said brightly. _She's beautiful… _he thought, grinning stupidly. Kitty failed to notice. She stood up.

"Nathaniel, you should sleep on the bed, because you're injured," Kitty said, motioning to the bed. Nathaniel was going to protest but then his side hurt, so he nodded.

In about twenty minutes or so, Nathaniel and Kitty were both ready for bed. Kitty would sleep on a blanket on the ground, while Nathaniel slept on the small twin size bed. They turned the light off, and after bidding each other good night silence overtook the room as Nathaniel and Kitty tried to sleep.

Nathaniel looked down at Kitty's prone form. She had her back to him. He took in her features that were visible in the almost nonexistent light: her hair, reaching past her shoulders, with its streaks of grey and white visible in the moonlight that came though the window, her tattered jeans and ripped shirt, the white wristband on her right hand.

Nathaniel thought about how she had watched over him in the hospital, seldom leaving his side. She had slept in the chair and then in the hospital bed that was barely big enough for one. He couldn't let her sleep like this again, injured or not.

"Kitty?" He whispered, checking if she was asleep. She turned around to face him.

"Hmm?"

"You are not going to sleep on the floor." He said, helping her onto the bed. She didn't complain. Nathaniel smiled at her, and she smiled back. Having her warm body lying next to him felt right. "Good night," he said.

**~Meanwhile~**

Meanwhile, in the room next door to theirs was Mark, Nathaniel's driver. Mark was trying to piece together what was going on. Why would Mandrake invite a bunch of commoners into their home? Obviously to get votes, but to talk and joke with the commoners? That was unlike him. And the way he talked to Kitty and the way they WERE SHARING A ROOM was not good news at all. Mark decided he had seen enough.

He promptly turned into a bat and flew out the window, into the darkness.

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Nathaniel woke up the next morning. He realized Kitty was no longer lying next to him. He got up and stumbled to the door, half asleep.

He decided he would ask Mark where Kitty was. Nathaniel knocked at Mark's door but no one opened it. Nathaniel turned the doorknob and stepped in. The room was empty and the window was open. It didn't seem as if anyone had slept there that night.

It was 9:30 am, so he didn't wake up that late. Nathaniel decided he would go to the dining room and look for Kitty there. Maybe she was eating breakfast.

In the dining room he saw parents feeding their children and chatting with other adults. Several heads turned and looked at him. People smiled and asked him how he'd slept. Nathaniel halfheartedly answered their questions as he searched the room. No luck. Where the heck could Kitty have gone?

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**_Bartimaeus_**

The Other Place did me a world of good. I was no longer fatigued and my essence had healed completely. It was nice to be back.

I tried to enjoy myself, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't help but wonder if my efforts to save Nathaniel were successful. I know, this is strange because he made me serve him for two years straight, much longer than necessary, while giving me ridiculous jobs like taking out the laundry. Unbelievable. I should be hating his guts, but here I am fretting over whether he is alive or not. I would've thought if he was alive he would've summoned me already. Just to say thank you or something like that.

By now I realized that I unconsciously shaped my essence into Nathaniel. Disgusting, right? A djinni with my level of intelligence showing such weakness? I quickly turned myself back into a ball.

Time passed(1), and suddenly I felt a tug. Finally, Natty boy was summoning me! I decided I would give him a nice pleasant surprise when I saw him. I shaped into Kitty Jones(2) and gave in to the tug. I couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he sees me.

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(1)Earth rules of time did not exist in the Other Place, so it was impossible to measure time.

(2)The Kitty I turned into was wearing a short skirt and had a slightly exaggerated chest and curves. Enough to give Nathaniel a little shock, just like old times.

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When I appeared in the magician's room my jaw almost hit the ground. In front of me was not Nathaniel, but his rival and former crush, Farrar. She was dressed in all black with a grin on her face that showed her arrogance. I picked my jaw off of the ground and glared at her while making a rude gesture with my hand.

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**What in the world is Farrar up to? Where is Kitty? How does Mark fit into all of this?**

**So how was it? Please review and tell me how it was! The reviews convince me to keep writing for you wonderful people. The reviews can be as short as you want, no need to be complex ;) **

**Have a nice day!**

**WhySoComplex, out. **


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